Alpha’s Badass Mate novel

---- Alex pulls back a little, and his hand tilts her beautiful face so they lock eyes. 'I am back now, love; Iam here to make your breakfast in the morning before you know it. And we will have plenty of time to show how much we mean to each other. But right now..." Alex leans in to peck Ashly's lips, short yet meaningful, like the time they have before they must part. "Right now," Alex continues. "In the upcoming weeks , let's make memories again with our Adom.

Let's give me both his mom's and dad's love." Ashly nods. A smile blossoms prettily on her lips before she presses closer and kisses Alex. It starts with an unsettling dream. Alex stayed at his place for the first time in two weeks since they got back together, needing fresh clothes and work- related things for the next day. He regretted it most last night before he fell into an uneasy sleep after Ashly's last message, a yearning expanding in his chest throughout his body.

Alex wakes up, feeling awkward and somehow wrong. He feels heavier than usual; his limbs are oddly weak and a little uncoordinated ; his mind is cloudy; and he is irritably tired. And deep down, the dark, anxious feelings are stirring up, which he's been managing to keep under control. ---- He's not as focused at work as his co-workers know him to be, and even the most oblivious person notices it eventually .

Of course , Ashly does right away, and Alex wonders whether he would have asked her about it in the morning after waking up if they had spent the night together. Alex wonders why they didn't. He wants to be nowhere but with his partner and his son. But he's afraid, in the back of his mind, that it's too soon for both of them to have them there all the time when, for years, he was painfully absent.

He wants to give Ashly space and time if she needs it, but he also wants to be close to her every minute of every day. The dream probably happened because he wasn't with her, but it's not Ashly's responsibility ; Alex has to deal with his own demons somehow. He feels more and more frustrated and listless as the day goes on. Ashly has a late appointment but demands that Alex leave. Wait for me at home and rest; I'll be there as soon as I can.

And don't worry about Adom; he is staying with Sebestian and Allen; both of them miss him, so they kidnapped him for toady. Alex wants to argue, but Ashly's voice in his ears, speaking of home, has him nodding. Home...? At least he won't have to sleep alone tonight. But the house isn't the same without Ashly and Adom's presence, because Alex knows, of course, that ---- Ashly really is what feels like home to him, no matter the place, and Ashly is what's missing , making him restless.

He watches the news on his phone, unable to concentrate, turns it off before it finishes, and lies down on the sofa, shutting his eyes, trying to relax. His muscles are stiff and sore; from his head to his calves, he feels tension and aches, and he can't seem to calm himself down. He sighs and brings his arm down from where he had positioned it over his face, annoyed and confused at himself. He sits and rubs his face with both hands, drops them into his lap, and glances around.

His mate's laptop He opens it, needing to find some sort of distraction. Eventually he checks the music folders, and one name jumps out at him, sending a cold shower along his spine. He clicks on it. Love. He knows half of the song titles , and a cold and sad sensation is slowly spreading inside of him. He should not listen to these songs, but an invisible pull compels him to. No matter which he chooses , they're about lost love, heartbreak , letting go, and scorned lovers.

Images of Ashly, his beautiful mate, listening while crying in bed, even on this sofa, flood his mind, and tears are rushing and spilling from his eyes before he's even aware of them. It was only a matter of time -a day like today-to bring all the accumulated misery of those seven years back to the surface. ---- He wanted it all to remain in the past.

Not to forget - he doesn't deserve that -but to be dormant, hidden, so he could have every day from now on to make it up to Ashly, to redeem himself eventually. If he can. Asob travels from his lungs into his throat, the sound startlingly loud despite the soft music playing. Alex falls backwards on his side, curling up into himself and crying his heart out, his whole being trembling , unable to stop.

It's how Ashly finds him, her instinct of something being wrong driving her to end her meeting sooner than planned , her stomach churning and colliding into knots when she realizes what the scene before her means. This damn playlist Why did his idiot find it? She drops his bag and jacket and heads towards Alex. His body is shaking lightly, but he isn't making a sound; his face is strewn with tear marks, and his eyes are shut tightly.

Ashly feels sick with worry, brushing hair from Alex's damp forehead. She quickly shuts the lid of her laptop to make the music die and leans over him, watching his face and softly trailing her fingers across his back and neck. "Alex? I'm here. Hey,Alex,are you listening tome?" She wonders whether Alex is asleep, but even if he is, he can't get any rest like this. She caresses his face